post chemo, etc.

I am doing pretty good about 6 days after the last chemo treatment. I got to see my amazing extended family over the weekend, which was fantastic. I am so grateful for their loving support.

I'm also getting used to wearing wigs. I feel like I'm wearing a disguise, particularly when I wear a wig and sunglasses. I'm trying to perceive it as a fun spy game, instead of feeling as though cancer has disrupted my visual identity. That's too gigantic to even think.

My muscles and bones hurt. Percoset is doing little for the pain in my legs, hips, and lower back.  I tried massaging my leg last night. When I changed for bed, I found giant bruises on my thigh. I wasn't being particularly rough, but I suppose I have to be even gentler. My leg muscles are so crampy that they have to stretch when I stand up straight with my feet flat on the ground. I wore heels to work today in the hopes that it would make it easier for me to walk. I would have thought that the idea of wearing heels to make walking easier was crazy a year ago, but things change.  I called the oncologist and surgeon to ask for more or different medications for the pain. It's difficult to sleep when my muscles ache.

I think the pain is also making it hard for me to eat. I have little appetite still. I get full pretty quickly and have to remember to eat.