ultrasound

Today is my ultrasound at Hahnemann Hospital.

I go into this giant waiting room and am immediately aware that I am, by far, the youngest woman in the room. Right. Most breast cancer patients are older than me.

I meet the biller and start to panic when he says that my referral had not gone through yet. He allows me to call my doctor's office and a minute later the referral is processed. (This process is so stupid and utterly maddening.)

The staff move me from room to room. Eventually, I walk into a room with 2 changing areas. I have to put the hospital gown on backward. I wait in the room and wonder what everyone else is there for.

Finally, they call me into a dark room and have me lie on my side with both of my arms above my head. It's kind of the most uncomfortable position ever. The radiologist technician jokes with me about boys as she finds Lumpy on her screen. I know it's a bad sign when she stops laughing with me. My breast is sore under the ultrasound device and I can't look at the screen. She leaves to get the radiologist doctor to interpret my ultrasound.

I start to cry and worry myself nauseous about what it could be.

The doctor comes to my table and holds my hands. He says something about it being "very suspicious" and that I shouldn't ignore it. I don't hear anything else he says.

I immediately go upstairs to my gynecologist's office to get an appointment with Dr. B. to go over these results.


touch count: 3